Long-distance relationship

The Science of Love -1

“The eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love.” Margaret Atwood
 You know that feeling; that feeling of longing. It’s the ache that something vital is missing from your life. You want more; more meaning, more connection, more energy – more something. Longing is that feeling that course through your body just before you decide that you’re restless, lonely, or unhappy.

Longing is not a state of mind, it’s physical. Your whole body craves some essential nutrient that it’s not getting, that is quite difficult to define. Sometimes you can numb this ache with a deep dive into work and television. More often than not, though, these and other attempts to fill the aching void are just temporary distractions.

What you are longing for is love. Love is the essential nutrient that your cells crave: true positive connection with other living beings. Love nourishes your body the way the right balance of sunlight, nutrient soil, and water nourishes plants and allow them to flourish. The more you experience it, the more you open up and grow, becoming wiser and more attuned, more resilient and effective, happier and healthier. You grow spiritually as well, better able to see, feel, and appreciate the deep interconnections that tie you to others.

Just as your body was designed to extract oxygen from the earth’s atmosphere, and nutrients from the foods you ingest, your body was designed to love. New science of love for the first time is able to prove this to be true. We know today, that the love you do or do not experience may quite literally change key aspects of cellular architecture that affect your physical health, […]

It is difficult to talk to my partner. How do I get my partner to open up?

Every couple has a dance, a cycle. There are moments that the couple is fully in sync with each other, but there are moments of missteps. In the dance of tango there is no script, is the connection with the partner that determines the next step. If we are not in sync, we will step on each other toes.

Every couple has those moments, but we need to repair the disconnection.

Complaints and criticism towards our partner are not the best ways to repair the disconnection. These actions may lead our partner to shut down and be distant emotionally.

It’s important to do some self-evaluation.

Are you emotionally and physically available to your partner?
Is it easy for your partner to access you?
Is your partner able to share his or her feelings with you?
Whenever someone is struggling, the person will send out some signals. Can you pick up the signals your partner is sending you?

A good start is to begin a conversation about the sense of disconnection you have noticed and difficulty both of you are having in communicating with one another.  Ask your partner about the things you might be doing that are causing him or her to shut down. This is a difficult step, but it can be helping in restoring connection.   When listening, keep your mind and heart open to hear your partner’s views of the problem. Make sure to set aside any kind of judgment about the things your partner is sharing with you. Be humble to see that there are new things to be learned. Let the words come and have an impact in your life. Listening to your partner’s perspective, shows that you respect his or her thoughts and feelings.

 

5 Tips To Show Your Love After Valentine’s Day

As the candles have been blown out, the romantic dinners had, gifts exchanged, and memories created, what do you do now to keep the love moving forward? Just because Valentines Day is over does not mean you have to stop showing the love that you have for someone. Love should not require us to show our significant others the love that they deserve just once a year, but instead daily. Love is something that, given enough tenderness, will grow deeper than you can imagine.

Many people have this thought that once Valentines Day is over, that’s it. No need to be extra romantic or extra special towards the one you care for. However, it is even more important to show your significant other after the holiday to remind them what a major factor they are in your life.

Here are some simple things to do to keep that romance alive through the year:

1. Flowers – Girls love flowers. Even better, your girl loves flowers sent to her job with a secret little note reminding her of how incredible she is to you. It makes everyone around her jealous and makes her blush and feel important.

2. Dinner – Don’t let going out or cooking for your significant other happen once a year. Make it a romantic occasion at least once a month. Find their favorite recipe, light some candles, put on some romantic music, and when they walk in the door, sweep them off their feet. It’s not every day that someone will sweep his or her significant other off the floor by going above and beyond. Who knows, you might have the romantic evening returned one day!

3. Baths – Really. After a long hard day at […]

5 Tips for Long Distance Relationships

Are you stressed about your long-distance relationship? Are you ready to break-up? Long-distance relationships are becoming a fact of life. As we advance in technology in the new world of social media with facebook and myspace, relationships are also changing. You are in a business trip and you meet someone at the airport, or you are using an online dating program, you find a potential mate, and you decide to pursue a relationship with that person.  According to a recent research, long-distance relationships are more stable than we think.  It was found that long- distance relationships are characterized by commitment, which is influenced by satisfaction and happiness with the relationship (Pistole, Roberts & Mosko, 2010). However, after a while it can be tiring and overwhelming trying to be in a long-distance relationship, especially when you have family and friends telling you that long-distance relationships do not work. Couples end up focusing on the frustrations of the distance and forget the reasons why they got together in the first place. Before you “call it quits”, here are some tips to making your long-distance relationship work:

1.Describe to your partner what the relationship means to you. This is the first step in moving forward with your relationship. Defining the relationship will help you create boundaries that will be used when things get difficult. Ask yourself, “Should we be just friends? Can we have a solid relationship?”

2.Be truthful to yourself and your partner. Be honest about your needs and don’t be afraid of sharing your feelings. Communication is going to be to most important element in your long-distance relationship and it will help create the strong foundation necessary to make the relationship work.

3.Be patient. Sometimes the “waiting” can […]