Is My Partner Depressed?

  Have you noticed changes in your partner? Have they withdrawn from activities they use to enjoy? Have their sleep patterns changed? Do they often feel sad, down or empty? If your partner is experiencing one or more of these symptoms, they may be suffering from depression.   Symptoms of depression vary from person to person. They may include one or several of the following: Feeling tired all the time Changes in sleep patterns – sleeping more or less Withdrawing from social activities Irritability Loss of interest in food, exercise and sex Thoughts of suicide We all have a bad day now and then. We may feel down, want to stay in bed, or simply want to be alone.  So how can you tell if your partner is just “having a bad day” or if they are suffering from depression? A person suffering from depression will be experiencing more than one of these symptoms on an ongoing basis (at least 1 week). These symptoms will also be impacting their ability to function on a daily basis. The CDC’s latest studies show that 1 in 10 Americans report feeling depressed. If you think that your partner is depressed, here’s what you can do to help. Be There – Let your partner know that you are there for them. Tell them that you love them and will help them through this. Listen – When your partner wants to talk about what they are feeling and what they are going through, listen to them. Don’t judge. Educate Yourself – Do your research on depression. Find out the symptoms, the triggers and the possible treatments. Depression can be misunderstood as a “loss of love” for a partner since they [...]

Positive Self-Talk – 5 Strategies To Monitor Your Self-Talk

Thinking in a positive way and stopping the negative thinking pattern is a good strategy you can use to handle the stress you might be experiencing in just about any circumstance. A positive mood can increase your ability to process new information and it helps improve your self-esteem. Can you teach yourself to think positively? ABSOLUTELY! You can use cognitive restructuring, a process of replacing the thoughts, ideas, and beliefs that maintain an individual’s problems. The self-talk, or positive self-statements are soundless, mental speech you can use when you are thinking about something, planning, or trying to solve a problem. The self-talk can do a lot to give you the confidence that frees you to use your talents to the fullest. Here are 5 strategies to help you keep your self-talk in check: Fine-tune your self-talk.  During the day ask yourself, “What am I saying to myself right now?”  Then write the thoughts and analyze the statements and the feelings behind them. Use uncomfortable emotions and moods such as stress, depression, and anxiety as a cue to listen to your self-talk.  Identify the feeling, then ask yourself, “What was I saying to myself right before I started feeling this way?” Compare your self-talk predictions (what you thought was going to happen) with what actually happened. If the reality is different, pinpoint where your self-talk needs adjustment. Get help from a friend, partner, or therapist. Find someone who can help you identify ways your self-talk is distorted and help you improve your self-talk. Find the statements that help you cope more effectively with stressful situations.   Replace Negative Self-Statements with Positive Ones Negative Self-Statement “I’ll never get this work done by tomorrow.” Positive Self-Statement “This is going to [...]

6 Tips To Reboot Your Weight Loss Program

The New Year is in motion and how are you doing with your new year’s resolution weight loss goals?  Did you do well for a few weeks and now you are feeling depressed because you haven’t been able to stick with the plan? We have seen the amazing weight loss success of the singer and actress Jennifer Hudson.  Her amazing transformation was so impressive that it is even hard to recognize her.  But how did she do it?  Through the adversities in life, the brutal murder of her dear mom, brother and young nephew, Hudson has been able to find internal motivation to make healthy changes in her life.   You also have experienced adversities in your life; financial problems, a loss of a loved one, a break-up, disappointments, frustrations, and changes in your schedule, making it very difficult to focus on dieting.  Jennifer Hudson speaks about the love for her son and husband as a source of energy she used to stay focused.  What are some of the positive things that have helped you stay focused on your wellness plan?  Maybe your family, children, friends and workout buddies have helped you stay focused in the past.  Select key people in your life to hold you accountable and to get you back on track. First of all, before starting a diet or exercise program, make sure you have consulted your doctor.  If you have started your program but have not been able to stick with the plan, here are some tips to reboot your weight loss program. Learn the Oh, Well technique: when you start to feel deprived about restricting your food, work toward acceptance:  If I want to lose weight, be healthier, I have to [...]

12 Characteristics of Adult Children of Alcoholics

Alcoholism, known as “alcohol dependence syndrome” is a disease that is characterized by craving, loss of control and physical dependence. Alcoholics, as well as being victims themselves, have an adverse impact on those with whom they associate. Research has shown that children of alcoholics develop some personalities traits that may impact their lives as an adult. Here are 12 characteristics of adult children of alcoholics described by Woitiz (1988): 1.Adult children of alcoholics guess what normal behavior is. 2.Adult children of alcoholics have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end. 3.Adult children of alcoholics lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth. 4.Adult children of alcoholics judge themselves without mercy. 5.Adult children of alcoholics have difficulty having fun. 6.Adult children of alcoholics have difficulty with intimate relationships. 7.Adult children of alcoholics over-react to changes over which they have no control. 8.Adult children of alcoholics constantly seek approval and affirmation. 9.Adult children of alcoholics usually feel that they are different from other people. 10.Adult children of alcoholics are super responsible or super irresponsible. 11.Adult children of alcoholics are extremely loyal, even if in the face of evidence that the loyalty is undeserved. 12.Adult children of alcoholics are impulsive. Research shows that adult children of alcoholics are at risk at becoming alcoholics, abusing drugs, attempting or committing suicide.  Also, they may develop patterns of compulsive behavior such as overeating and other eating disorders. And adult children of alcoholics tend to marry alcoholics partners. If you are an adult child of an alcoholic remember that you are not alone. Millions of people have grown up in families with alcohol-related problems. Because of the environment you grew up in, you had to develop [...]

7 Tips for Coping With Loneliness

The holiday season is here. You see people decorating their houses, wrapping gifts and placing them under the Christmas the tree and you feel the warmth and the joy of having your family and friends close to you. The magic of the holidays bring people together and we look forward to this celebration all year-long. However, for some of us, this season is a reminder of the mistakes we have made and the people we may have hurt along the way.  Maybe the loss of a loved one and the end of a long-term relationship can bring up sadness and anxiety during the holidays. It is very common for some people to feel extremely lonely during this season. Loneliness has been described as an emotion that is characterized by a feeling of emptiness and solitude.  Some words people use to describe loneliness include: lost, afraid, numb, pain, nothingness, overwhelmed, and so on. According to Carlson and Love (2010), recent studies have revealed that about 25 percent of the American population has not talked to anyone about anything important to them in six months. Also they found that another 19.6 percent of the people surveyed said that they only have one close friend  they can talk to. These numbers show that close to 50 percent of the population has one close friend or none at all. How did we get here? Today we live in a fast-paced world; we work longer hours or we may even have two jobs. Also, we have distractions such as the Internet, social media, and cellphones. It’s becoming more and more difficult to develop and nurture relationships. This lifestyle eventually leads to isolation and after a while we start to struggle [...]