5 Reasons Why Your Ex Should Stay Your Ex

There are many major life moments that each person may go through. Some are easier than others, and then you have the truly hard ones. The hardest thing for most people to go through is breaking up with someone that they care intimately about for multiple reasons. When you share a connection with someone that you think may be the one and it comes to a point where your paths no longer are shared, breaking up is sometimes the answer. Often times, when someone leaves a significant other, they have regrets and consider reconciling and getting back together with them. In a recent study, 44% of emerging adults in the last two years have had a reunion with their ex. With emotions being incredibly intense after a break-up, it is no wonder people may have the regret of breaking up and want to reconcile. However, it is important to look at the situation and evaluate why you left that person in the first place. There is the old saying that many people say of “Your ex is an ex for a reason”. So should you reconcile with your significant other? Take a look at why they are your ex and what made you incompatible with them in the end. These are some reasons why you should not reconcile with an ex: 1. You changed who you were for them – Many times in relationships, one, or both parties, will change who they are for the other person. Yes, there is such thing as changing for the better, but you cannot sacrifice all of who you are for someone else. If you did this, get back to who you are, not who you “were” for that [...]

Anger Management Therapy for Me?

We are all aware of the term "Anger Management". When we hear it, we may think of the movie starring Jack Nicholson as a therapist who has his patient move in with him for therapy. We may also think about the new TV show with Charlie Sheen starring as a therapist to an eclectic group suffering from "anger issues".  Or we may think Anger Management therapy is for someone else and not for us. Regardless of out initial thoughts, Anger Issues have been around for generations, are here to stay and are on the rise in our society. The next time you become angry, answer the questions below. If you can answer yes to any of them, you could benefit from therapy. Do you feel ready to "lash out" physically or verbally at the person who has angered you? Do you feel ready to "lash out" physically or verbally at anyone who may come into contact with you during your anger? Do you feel the need to physically harm yourself? Do you feel the urge to destroy property?   Fallout from mismanaged anger can have devastating effects on you, your relationships, and those around you. These effects include: divorce, domestic violence, addiction and in severe cases mass homicide and suicide. What benefits can you expect from Anger Management Therapy? Less Stress - Just talking about your anger and it's triggers can make you feel less stressed. In addition, you will learn tools and techniques to recognize when you are becoming angry and how to diffuse that anger. Improved Health - Anger takes a physical toll on your body. This toll can include high blood pressure, overeating and physical harm to yourself. Therapy can help to [...]

Are You Tired of Fighting? Here Are Ten Tips for Conflict Resolution

All couples have differences and disagreements; conflict is part of life.  However, many couples have difficulties listening and understanding each other, leading to many arguments, fights and even separation. Many studies show the amounts of disagreements are not related to marital happiness as much as how they are handled. The truth is that happy couples do not avoid disagreements; they resolve them while remaining respectful of each other, thereby strengthening their relationship. Many conflicts between partners become heated as levels of anger and frustration rise. And instead of them speaking assertively, couples begin to accuse, criticize, or yell. Rather than listening actively, they interrupt, belittle, and ignore. When we are in a state of escalation, we usually say or do things we later regret. Additionally, it is almost impossible to have a productive conversation leading to a mutually agreed upon resolution when partners are angry and frustrated. In instances such as this, a time-out plan can be beneficial. A time-out will give couples the opportunity to cool down, recognize their feelings and needs, and begin to think productively again about how to approach the issues they face.  Once you had the opportunity to calm down you can use these ten steps that are simple and effective to solve conflicts. These steps will help you avoid the destructive patterns of the past. Set a time and place for discussion. Once you have requested a time-out for yourself, communicate to your partner how important this issue is for both of you and set a time and place to have the discussion. Define the problem, be specific. Analyze the current issue and stay on topic. List the ways you contribute to the problem. Think about how you might [...]